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The legend of | Alamir Kamal Farag


Are you for or against the friendship between man and woman, and why? The traditional answer that depends upon our old culture is "against". In The most of whom you ask is them that question will refuse talking about it even before you ask. The old tribal culture; man and woman are like fire and oil, east and west, angel and devil. There is a huge gap between them and our old culture and tradition upon which we brought made this gap bigger and bigger. The boy is the boy, the girl is a girl, and there is a great danger if they gather together. Some families punish their sons if they play with girls however they all are kids.

But, there is a contrast as; if we look around, we will find women everywhere; as a colleague in work, as a classmate, as a neighbor, teacher, seller, ministers. Also we find cousin and sister's girlfriend,… etc. the woman is a part of the society that we can never separate or ignore.

salah Jahin, an Egyptian director, says that ; " the girl is as powerful as man and also has miracles, she is not a mere thing at all".

She is a part, an important part of the society's construction that we can't separate whether we will dissolve this society. We are to deal with women according to the current events and also according to our nature. So, what can we do for that?

Talking about the social intercourse between men and women or even their dissociation is not the aim of this discussion. This case, the social intercourse between men and women, is still discussed until now in some countries. But, now I want to talk about a very important relationship between the two elements of life, man and woman. Of course I'm completely for our religion's point of view about this case, which is declared in Hadith, "when man and woman gather alone, devil will be the third withy them".

I wonder why the first sight between man and woman is always a wrong one. Why? The woman represents the second half of the society and religion, she represents love and mercy. She is the maker of happiness and generations. Why our first sight at woman, or even the second, the third, is always a foul one? Why can not it be a respectful one that is out of good manners and principles?

In general, the Eastern man still thinks about the woman as a body for physiological needs only and never considers her mind. He considers her as a means of seduction and as if she is the reason of Adam being dismissed from paradise, which means that; she is the main cause our pain.

According to our Sharia and according to the great eternal boon which our Prophet (best prayers upon him) told us about, we want a solution.

We should elevate the woman's value. Our point of view should be more than a mere opinion on her dress, beauty, and fashion style. We should consider her mind and her way of thinking. We should consider the importance of her existence in life and society. The woman can be a friend, a faithful friend, whom we can deal with as a sister. Man can be a friend whom the woman can deal with as a brother. Why don't we elevate the friendship value between man and woman? Why do we completely refuse it and afraid of it?

I don't mean this friendship of the Westerns' point of view and its social corruption ideas. Also I don't mean this sort of friendship between man and woman that includes traveling or rambling together at night. But what I mean is that we can find a definition for the man and woman friendship that agrees with our principles and manners. Even if it was called by another term not "friendship", that we are afraid from by nature.

It may be a friendship under the supervision of parents, brothers, or husband; a friendship that is away from every things that is banned by our Sharia as gathering alone or bad behaviors, a friendship that grows to contain all the family members, not only one person of that family. There are a lot of examples for this kind of friendship everywhere, a friendship that is biased mainly upon the good manners under the supervision of the family. And keep in mind that bringing the child upon the good manners is very important. We will achieve a lot if the boy was brought up on respecting the girl and the girl was brought up on respecting him. The respected positive friendship between man and woman is much better than the secret passive one which no one can predict its results. I said before; to be clear and honest is better than to hide in darkness.

Actually, the communities which prevent the social intercourse between men and women did not succeed in preventing the practice of vice and adultery, the dissociation between fire and oil did not help in preventing the breaking out, it even sometimes it helped in increasing it.

So, the only solution is to spread virtue. We can not misunderstand any relationship between a man and a woman, whether our life will be hellish. In our social life, there are a lot of respected relations that we can never ignore as; the relationship between the boy and his brother's wife, "sister-in-law", and also the relationship between the girl and her sister's husband, "brother-in-law". These relationships are mere innocent brotherhood relations. We should bring our kids upon virtue and good manners as they are the main base for any relation.

I call for the positive friendship between man and woman which is based mainly upon suspect, good manners and clearness, not this random mysterious relation in dark. When you have a sister, you can have others, and when you have a brother, you can have more other brothers.

Stop panic from "the man-woman friendship", stop repeating the legend of "the Fox and the Lambs". Virtue is a radical behavior not just a frame. The good breeding is the breeding of souls not panic or dissociation.

تاريخ الإضافة: 2014-04-04 تعليق: 0 عدد المشاهدات :282
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